Celebrating

(Thank you Ch for the lovely time!)

These last few days we've had American Thanksgiving (joined in with some friends who are like family), it was our seventh wedding anniversary and today it is Toby's 5th month birthday (is that how you say it)!

SO much to celebrate and give thanks for.

Thankful for all the good things in life like food, friends, mom who babysits, cute movies like Arthur Christmas (that's what we watched on our night out haha), groupon-type vouchers (that's what we had for our anniversary meal- wasn't great but we did have three courses which was fun!) and a sweet baby.

I also got to go to a baby shower of a friend who is having a baby after waiting for a time, and having one miscarriage. We got to know each other via our little prayer group at church! It was a special shower and so exciting. It was also neat to know that the prayer support meant so much to her and her family. God does cool things.

Here are some pics.

I love you despite the mo.

Toby today.

Toby the other day looking a little crazy after testing out some pumpkin on him.

Toby's place setting at his Thanksgiving dinner. (Though he spent most of it on the floor trying to roll around...)

Hanging with dad.

Ten things at Twelvish

(wrong time. oh well.)

1. Thankful for pancakes this morning (after dreaming about them haha). YUM.

2. Thankful for a Saturday morning to chill and catch up with thoughts and things (laundry haha).

3. Thankful for some time I spent yesterday with two special friends who'd gone through miscarriages recently. It was good to catch up with them and just comforting to be able to talk about our 'children we've never met' openly and without reserve or feeling bad/weird. Glad we finally got to hang out!

4. Thankful for the Christchurch Earthquake Memorial Service that I watched this morning online cos' I missed it yesterday. It was hard to watch of course, but also a bittersweet reminder of God's power and strength in times of great need.

5. Thankful for God's supernatural comfort in times of deep sadness and grieving. Some dear friends have had to say goodbye to their dear tiny daughter, Eden Grace, who was 17 days old. She was born at 26 weeks of pregnancy. Her life was a miracle in itself, but it is so hard too... and I'm praying for her parents and brother as they cope with their loss. I cannot imagine how hard this is for them.

6. Thankful for the power of music that touches us even if we come from different perspectives and backgrounds. They sang a few beautiful songs at the Christchurch Memorial Service- like Amazing Grace and Welcome Home.

7. Thankful that my sis-in-law, K, was unhurt in a car accident this past week, where her SUV was turned on its side! Also cool that the kids were at home with my brother. Praying for them as this stuff is still always scary and can be stressful.

8. Thankful for soft-serve. Ya, serious.

(not my pic)

Haha yes. I love them. Plus, I don't know why it took me so long to catch on that the vanilla soft-serve cones at McDonald's are only 60-cents! Is there anything else that cheap around here?

I usually get the hot fudge/chocolate sundaes in a cup that cost way more. So I think I'll switch over to the cones... plus they probably are 'less bad' haha... NOW if only they had the half-chocolate and half-vanialla twist ones here... ahhhhh that'd be heaven. You know those? They don't have them here in NZ...

( AND Do you know? I used to have the Fisher-Price McDonald's Kitchen set, like this, yes they whole big thing with the drive through window and kitchen. The soft-serve machine was my favourite part!!!)

9. Thankful that we have made it to 24 weeks and 5 days of pregnancy.

It is fascinating and awesome to think that if I had the baby now (of course not ideal but just saying...) he would have a chance at surviving outside the womb. It would be registered as a birth in some countries, not sure about here. Just quite a thought! Praising God for this life.

10. Thankful for my mother who continues to feed me. She's been bringing me pots of food so that I don't have to cook that much. They last the husband and I a few meals a week.

It is a massive blessing because I've been so tired and some evenings I work, so it makes it very convenient. However, I hope she isn't using up all her cooking stamina because I'll need it more when baby comes!

Had a lunch break between writing point 8. and points 9.-10. so now it is like almost two! haha. Have a good day out there.

Random Ten Things at 10am

We have a team planning day ahead so let's see if I can squeeze a post in.

1. Saturday! How are you doing? Hope you have a good weekend. Are you doing anything with your man for Valentine's Day? We're not big V-Day types around here but we are thinking we might go have ice-cream tomorrow or something.

2. Check out this blog if you are into making crafty things for Valentines Day! There are so many crazy good ideas in here.

3. If you like photos and photography, check out this guy's stuff of his kids. They are such brilliant photos! Though I'm not sure how he does them. Helps that he is a professional photographer I guess haha... Here's his blog too if you want some recent/ongoing photos of them.

4. We have started a mini prayer network, called 'IF & When' at our church for those going through infertility and/or pregnancy loss... or just lots of waiting for children in general. I am so thankful that we have been able to do this and I'm hoping and praying that it will be a good support and encouragement to women at church and maybe even those in our community later on.

It is so exciting to see how God can use these hard and painful issues to connect some of us together...

5. My blog friend Heather wrote this beautiful post the other day. It is sort of along the same lines of a post I wrote a couple weeks ago, about how we, as wives, might feel about our husbands in this time of waiting for children.

6. I'm continually humbled by the number of people who have told me that they have been praying for the husband, baby and I. It is amazing. Thank you God for how sneakily and wonderfully You work!

I guess us being fairly open about our journey has allowed the information to be 'out there' so there are people who I don't know very well who have been thinking of us and praying for us. It means so much to me finding that out!

And it teaches me a thing or two because I really struggle to pray consistently for others, yikes. But anyway. Feeling very blessed.

** Pregnancy/Baby talk **

7. Our scan! It went very well. They checked on the baby's anatomy with so much detail. You could see so much (and we only did the normal scan, not the 3D one)... things look good... so relieved!

8. A boy! Very thankful that we got to find that out, as we were hoping to. We would've loved a girl too, so either is great of course. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't dreaming it up and just have some big grapefruit stuck in there. Honestly, yes was anxious. haha...

Yay!!!!! We kinda walked around in shock for a little while after. Is this for real?

9. So on Monday I make it to 20 weeks and that will be officially halfway. Ohmygosh. I kinda want the pregnancy to hurry up, so that I can meet this baby. I want to meet you! But I know I need to treasure these days too. So it is a funny feeling.

** Over and Out **

10. I'm feeling so much better but still tired a lot! Sigh... Hope you have had a good week? I'd better start getting ready. Think this was one of the fastest posts I've done. (Sorry if sentences are a bit choppy.) GO ME! Have a great weekend guys.

Going Public

Okay so not everyone will approve of this maybe but yesterday I posted our news on Facebook. I thought about it for a long (LONG) time and I decided to do it.

I know I know. Previously, I've moaned about how pregnancy announcements (like ones on Facebook) can be so hard- and they are... whatever the means of communication is. (Interestingly, since being pregnant, I have still found them difficult! Hard one to decipher.) So I tried to make sure I worded it sensibly and I emailed/messaged close friends a while beforehand so hopefully it lessens those who may find it hard or too surprising, as the surprise factor is always an element of it too.

You can't please everyone huh. And I know I'd like to so this is a learning process for me too.

For me writing that 'status' thing was a way for us to 'go public' and also to celebrate this baby. I also wanted to acknowledge that there are many friends and family who are with us on this ride, especially those who have been praying for us... this is answer to their prayers too... so I hope that was obvious.

Oh this is what I said if you are curious (yeah I maximised the 420-ish spaces you are allowed haha):

We have a bun in the oven. Not kidding. As u can imagine, we are thankful beyond words, n God has definitely surprised us with this ridiculously awesome gift. Thankful for many of u who have been praying for n journeying with us. We've also made it to 14 weeks, which is a massive miracle n further (n less complicated) than our previous pregnancies. Celebrate n pray with us that we will be able to carry baby to term!

Overall... I am grateful for the fact that I even get to say, 'We're pregnant.' That has been a phrase that I have become so allergic to these past years. I know some of you guys know what I mean.

Hmmm... I guess the conflicting beast that infertility is continues for a while!

ANYWAY. I'm on break, can you tell? That's why I have time to post haha. Talk more soon.

A note to you.

A special note to IF friends and sisters, and others who are/have been waiting with me:

Hi there. Your support and encouragement has been invaluable to me.

SO. Now I have become one of "those" women, who tried almost everything, was on a break, applied for adoption, and got pregnant out of the blue. I am praying my story does not haunt and irritate other waiting-women for years to come- but I have no control over it (I'm sorry... sigh!).

At the same time, I know this story is a miracle. I have not tracked an ovulation for the three years we've been trying, besides when on fertility drugs. I mean, I have joked about an immaculate conception, but I feel like this comes pretty close and I'm so thankful for this. I'm also so aware that the fact that we've made it to 13 weeks and 2 days of pregnancy with no complications is another miracle, after the ones we've lost early.

I don't know why God has decided to show us such grace at this time, yes we have been praying and others too, but so have you for your child, so why me and not you, and why now and not before or later, who knows?

We don't take this for granted and we are trying our best to celebrate each day of it, while praying we can carry this one to term.

When I wrote 'unexpected journey' in the little blurb under my blog title I didn't really think of this extent of the unexpected! Gosh. Yet at the same time we've been praying for it so what else was I thinking? I'm also still keen to continue this blog so we'll see what happens.

I just wanted to acknowledge you and let you know that your support and prayers are what have sustained us and continue to be needed. I also want to keep caring for you so please let me know how best I can.

Love s

Christmas Day

Merry Christmas everyone!

(nativity set from my in-laws. first christmas that i get to display them! fun times.)

How are you doing?

I know today is a day of celebrating and enjoying time with friends and family. For us we pretty much received our gift and Christmas miracle early- our pregnancy. (um... Read previous post if you missed that.) Who knew? I still can't help but say it all seems so crazy. However I have also been thinking of those in the midst of a heart-breaking time.

I have two special friends who have gone through miscarriages this week. Each of them are very dear to me and it is heart-breaking to know they are grieving for their little child, especially right in this season of what should be joy and hope. Even though I can relate, I want so much to comfort them but words still escape me.

I also acknowledge a friend who misses her mother who has passed, and another friend who is going through a marriage separation.

These are all paths they also never imagined they'd be on. At times like Christmas, as much as it is a wonderful time, I'm sure you IF-ers know too, the realities of life can be so hard to avoid- yet another Christmas tree with no presents under it to buy for the child you imagine you'd have by now.

'I'm praying for you' is what I say, but it can seem so empty or overused when the depth of the pain appears so bottomless...

Oh Lord I continue to be thankful and overwhelmed by the infinite nature of your grace and mercy. The birth of Christ signifies the hope and life you bring. Yet I'm sure You also knew the double-edged-ness on the day of His birth, as it would mean His death and sacrifice for all of ours. (I think there is a song about this or maybe many songs but I can't remember it right now.)

You probably also had great joy and great sorrow as Jesus was welcomed to this broken world- knowing what was to come. I pray for comfort for these dear friends Lord. It can only come from You. All the words and gifts we may bring are useless and ultimately empty without You involved.

There are also so many questions we bring Lord. Could you have made it less painful? Better timing? Saved it for when we were prepared? How long more?

Anyway. We bring you these messed-up things and we know there is no other way but to let you handle them.

I know. Sorta heavy. But that's just what's on my mind. Hmmm...

It is actually already the end of Christmas day here. I had a lovely day (pancakes, presents, Skype, family, friends, etc. ) with special family here and I hope the same has been/will be for you too.

(this is what my living room is looking like...)

Goodnight!

Hello Monday

It is back to work for me today after a week off. Hope you had a good weekend too?

(Got to soak in a bit of sunshine this past week.)

Resuming life after time off always tends to give me like a small panic attack so I'm gonna take a few mins to reorganise my head after this post (and pray!), haha. It is also crazy that it is like 12 weeks to Christmas or the end of the year. Mad. Maybe I should put my tree up now so that'll be one less thing to do?

There were a few beautiful days here in Auckland (yay!) and I got to catch up on some goofy movies- Grown Ups, Date Night and Despicable Me (loved it). Yes, somehow I have to watch light and funny movies at the moment. I can't handle anything too sad or too serious. Even animated films can get the tears flowing so I'm staying away from anything that's actually intense. Silly all the way is good thanks.

Anyway here are a couple links to some posts that caught my eye:

• When we just don't know the words to pray, by Holley at Dayspring- sharing this cos' I often feel like this when someone shares with me about stuff in their life, and
• Why its really worth it to tell your secrets, by Ann Voskamp- sharing this cos' I really like this and often wonder about the idea of vulnerability and the goods and bads of being open about your life...

They each have a blog too if you scroll through the article you will find it. Both are part of this website, (in)courage, which often has some posts that speak straight to the heart.

Why do days-off always go by so fast? I hardly got anything on my 'list' crossed off. Typical! Sigh. Haha... Have a great week.