She Said It Better - Some Stuff On Loss...

I noticed while looking around online the other day that October 15th is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day in the US! What interesting timing, as this topic had just been particularly on my mind too...

Today's post looks a bit long but I'm sharing couple links and a thing that I copy-pasted... If you skip the links, do read the copy-paste bit below, as I found it pretty powerful.

I'm thinking a lot around the idea of life in the womb... I have found it so difficult to get my head around it. Like I do believe life starts at conception, but when it is your own and when you miscarry at an early stage, like five weeks, it is just hard to know what to think of it or how to feel... because it seemed so unreal.

Anyway, there were a couple of good posts that came up on (in)courage again that made me confront this issue a bit more. They are not actually about miscarriage, so not directly related, but at the core of it these women would've had to sort out their thoughts too.

• She Made Me a Mommy With Hope, by Teske Drake- She carried on with her pregnancy knowing the baby was not going to do well...
• Face to Face, by Heather Gemmen Wilson- She had one of her children as a result of rape... and has faced judgement from others...

Both women have gone on to impact others as a result of their experience and it is fascinating to see what God has done with it.

If you have gone through miscarriage and pregnancy/baby loss (or are friends with someone who is) I hope the following is encouraging to you too. I know it may be really hard to read but it spoke to me deeply and maybe it will to you too.

This is from a 'Double Daily Portion' email that I get from Sarah's Laughter (a resourcing ministry for infertility/loss). The writer/founder, Beth Forbus, is gifted at writing from a biblical and empathetic perspective. I have found it hard but soothing to read. This was sent out specifically for this week to acknowledge October 15th.

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Why does it hurt so badly to lose a baby? Even one only a few weeks post-conception? The answer, my friend, is actually pretty simple. That tiny, little baby—even if he or she was no more than a few cells—was created in the very image and likeness of God Almighty! Oh, the preciousness of this tiny little creature! For a short time, your mortal frame, or that of your spouse, housed the very image and likeness of God Himself.

We can only imagine what God looks like. We are told in Scripture that if we were able to look at Him with human eyes that we simply could not take it and we’d fall dead (Exodus 33:20). However, He found a way to give us a glimpse of Himself. He created us in His image and in His likeness. Not exactly like him. He may not have green eyes and brown hair like me, but I’ve been created in His image and His likeness. Your baby was too, and this makes your baby precious. Oh, the unfathomable worth of the child who has God’s fingerprints all over them!

God even says “Before I formed you in your mother’s womb, I knew you”. He doesn’t saunter into a delivery room and look as a newborn takes its first breath and say “Thanks, doc. I’ll take it from here!” Birth is not a prerequisite for God’s protection, God’s love or God’s involvement in your baby’s life. Before your baby was conceived in your body, he or she was already conceived in the heart and mind of God. Before you loved your child, God loved your baby. Before you prepared your nursery, God had already prepared a place. Before you knew you’d lay down your life to save your baby, God laid down His life to save his or her soul. God never planned on waiting until your baby was born to know and love your baby.

God still loves you. Even though He has allowed you to walk through the devastation of miscarriage. He offers you His comfort and His healing. You can pour out your heart to God and He’ll understand. When friends, family, and even your spouse can’t bear to see your tears anymore, God has incredibly broad shoulders for you to cry on and strong arms for you to fall into. Lay your head on His chest and hear His heart beating. A heart that broke just like yours has.

As you find comfort in the bosom of Love Himself, don’t forget to look into His eyes and see the promise of a heavenly and eternal reunion with your child. One that will not end in miscarriage. No SIDS allowed inside the gates of pearl! No stilled heartbeats. No blighted ovums. No spontaneous abortions. No grief. No sadness. Just an eternity with the child you’ve held in your heart so much longer than in your body! And an eternity with a God who loved you enough to orchestrate the death of His only Son to provide a way to reunite you with your child.

There is no doubt that Heaven will be an incredible place that defies the description of man. Never in our wildest imagination could we begin to come close to imagining what God has in store for those who love Him and have received His gift of salvation. Psalm 127 tells us that children are a gift and a reward. If you are a Christian, your gift is unopened, waiting for your arrival in Heaven. What joy your heavenly reunion with your child will bring! Perhaps the only place you ever saw your baby was on a positive pregnancy test or on a stilled sonogram screen.

Child of God, you will see your baby one day! You’ll see the expressions on their face, smell their fragrance, and hear that precious voice in the place that God has prepared. Was a hospital room the only place you were ever able to hold your stilled child in your arms? One day, because of the sacrifice of Calvary you’ll explore together all that Heaven has to offer. For the child of God these are great and precious promises.

Not only are you assured an eternity with the baby you have loved and lost, but even more importantly, you will be with the God who loved you enough to sacrifice His baby to allow you an eternity with yours. All you have to do is accept His salvation and with a joyful, redeemed heart join Him at His home. He—and your child—are waiting for you there.

(c) 2008 Sarah’s Laughter-Christian Support for Infertility & Child Loss

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 If you think these words may also comfort someone else you know... do send it on!

Thanks for reading...