Thursday, April 22, 2010
A Piece of Cake- not
It is Birthday Week. I'm trying to celebrate it in small and different ways the best I can.
Some of you will laugh (or maybe be kinda annoyed I'm saying this) because I'm really only turning 28, so there's little to worry about- I'm still young blah blah blah. And I've never been one to really care about my age- in fact there have been times that I've even forgotten whether I was 25 or 26 or 27... It has never really mattered much to me. But this year it is actually bugging me a tad. Just a tad.
I can hear the tick-tock. I have become Captain Hook. Obsessed about the clock in the croc.
It is not about the number. I know it is not actually about the number, even though that's what's visually hanging out in my head and the math I keep doing back and forth.
It is the same-old-same-old. It is about the not knowing. It is about the looming, "God, what are you doing?" questions. I may be 'young' but no one actually knows what the future brings, it doesn't guarantee fertility and kids. If I've got issues now, I've got issues now, it doesn't just go away after a certain time of gaining a qualifications in classes like Infertility 101, Quick Responses to Awkward Questions 210 and Pelvic Examination Techniques 350.
(Though wouldn't that be fab?)
Anyway. I guess it is just ANOTHER thing that I was naive about previous to this infertility journey- and we know that list is looong.
So I'm trying my best to make the most of my Celebration Week and think of different things to do that are fun, instead of being afraid of it. (It is true- the word is actually 'afraid'.)
Funnily enough, they mostly revolve around food. (And great people of course!) Here is my list:
1. On Tuesday, I baked hefty chocolate chip cookies with extra hunks of dark chocolate in them. For me for me! (Usually I make them more for the husband.) It was good.
2. Thursday, tonight, I'm meeting a friend for bubble tea, which I love.
3. On Friday I'm having one of my favourites,Vietnamese for dinner and a little dessert night with closer friends. (One of my best friends shares the same birthday! Yay!)
4. On Saturday, the husband and I are gonna have breakfast together.
5. Last year I made a birthday t-shirt by buying a top and adding a small '27' on it in diamantes (I think this was the quiet start to when I knew I needed to start overcoming my age-issues haha)... so maybe this year I should do another similar thing with '28'. This could be my own little tradition/joke/thing. I love shopping so that would be a good excuse to shop. haha!
6. Maybe I will treat myself to a new CD too. hmmm.
7. Have actually also pre-celebrated with the husband over the Easter weekend. Was spoiled. I'm super thankful for that.
That's my list for now. Any more suggestions?
tick tock. haha.